2p!America x reader- Christmas with her family

His eyes opened slightly to peek up at you. He closed them back and grunted, "What?"

You swing your right hand in the air. "Lookie. It's a mistletoe" You poke your lips out and lean down a little. He smirked before making contact with your lips. As he held onto your hips, you deepened the kiss a little before letting up and kissing him repeatedly. "How's my sweet, amazing husband? Guess what? I've been cleaning all morning and the house looks perfect! I made your favorite vegan breakfast and I went out to buy you some beer and a bunch of your other favorite alcoholic beverages" You kissed his cheek and leaned in closely to his ear as you whispered, "But I could go and get your breakfast for you later...just encase, we're doing...other things"

He touched your shoulders and moved you back up so he could look you in your eyes. You tilted your head in a bit of confusion. "...What did you do?"

"W-what? I haven't done anything! I'm just being a thoughtful. considerate wife!" You looked down as you fiddled your fingers. "...But...I would like you to do something for me..."

"What is it?"

"Well....You love me right?"

"Depends"

"Al!!"

"I'm just playing with you, doll" He pulled you down into a hug.

You cuddled into his chest. "I knew you were...Since you do, you wouldn't mind coming with me to spend Christmas with my family, right?" You were suddenly pushed off of him before he turned over and buried his face into his pillow. "Al!!"

"Not happening. Your family is fucking weird!"

"H-how so?!"

He turned his head and looked at you lazily. "Your auntie wants to marry your uncle...Who is her brother!"

"T-that's one person in my family! Give another example!"

"Your cousin Hercules has more cats than a fucking ninety-four year old widow!"

"H-he...He really likes cats! Is that a crime?!"

"Your aunt's boobs are so got damn huge! Do you know how hard it is to NOT say shit about those?!"

"W-well...I-it's winter! H-her sweater'll cov-"

"A censor bar couldn't cover those!"

You looked around for something to say to retort to that. "....You have to go!! I can't go there without you! We've only been married of six months! If I go there without my husband, my cousin's won't let me hear the end of it!" You grab onto his arm. "They'll all think we're having problems!! I want them to see just how happy we are!! We're fucking happy, damn it and they're gonna see it and all it's lovey dovey bullshit!!"

"(n-name)! Calm the hell down!"

"You're going or I'm tying you up in the living room and making you watch me as I burn...your bat"

"You wouldn't"

"Please do try me. I'll go get it now!"

"Ok! Ok!...No need for such drastic measures"

"So you'll go?!", you bubbled.

"Fine..."

"Yay!!", you clapped before hopping out of the bed. 

"Hey! Pass me my breakfast!"

"You got two legs. Get the fuck up and get it yourself", you replied before leaving the room.

"Fuck!"

Two days later you were sitting in the living room, wrapping gifts up for some of the cousins that you liked. You didn't even spend that much money but you got quite a few things to give. There was then knocking at the door. Al was coming down the stairs when it happened. You waved to him before saying, "I'll get it!"

When you opened the door, a plate of cupcakes were being held out in front of you. "Merry almost Christmas~!", you brother-in-law, Oliver greeted you as his two other brothers, Matt and Francis, just nodded once to show they saw you there.

You took the plate from him. "Thanks Oliver! You too! Come on in!", you invited them inside and placed the cupcakes on the living room table.

"Good afternoon, Al!", Oliver called to Al as the three of them sat on the couch..

Al flipped him off. "Bite me"

"Don't mind him, Ollie. He's just a little grumpy", you shot a glare to him before sitting in the chair across from them.

"Oh? Why is that?"

"He's just mad that we're going to spend Christmas with my family"

"Your family?"

"She forced me to do it!", Al added.

You rolled your eyes. "Yeah. Some of them were at the wedding, Al's met others, but they'll ALL be at my uncle Ivan's house for this Christmas. He has the biggest house"

"Oh! Would Kat happen to be there?!"

You looked at him a bit awkwardly. "You mean my aunt Katyusha?"

"Yes! I like to call her kitty kat. She was so cute when she blushed at it"

"You two must have hit it off pretty well" He blushed a bit and looked down smiling. "Would you like to come too?!"

"Oh, can we?!"

"Like hell I'm going there!", Matt objected.

"I'm sure you'll like it, Matt!", you tried to convince him.

"Come on, Matt! It'll be fun!"

"Fuck. That. I'm not going"

You got up and sat on the arm of the couch, next to Matt. "Why not? I bet my cousin Dyah would like to see you. Remember her? Short chick, big tits. Pot smoker", you cleared your throat. "She's deep throated too", you quietly mentioned as you scratched behind your head.

"Alright, I'm in"

"And Francis!", you scurried off next to him.

"What?"

"You'll love it! Do you know how many single, desperate cousins and aunts I have? I can see them now, practically begging for you"

"Well I did fuck three of your cousins during your wedding day"

"What?!"

"You already convinced me"

You try to quickly shake the thought of any of your cousins having sex with Francis, out of your head. "W-well ok then! This'll be a good Christmas!"

"Since they're going, does that I don't have to go anymore?!", Al asked hopefully.

"You're going", you bluntly crushed his hopes.

On Christmas day, you were making sure everything was good. You looked over all the presents you bought and made sure you had them in a good order. You knew you wouldn't be able to give them all away at one time. You had too much family for everyone to be at one room at one time, unless it was time to eat, that was a maybe too. You even had some cookies in the oven, baking as you waited for everyone to be ready to go. You felt Christmas cookies would be nice to bring.

"No wonder the house smelt burnt", you heard behind you.

You narrowed your eyes at him before hitting the back of his head. "You lucky...You lucky you met me. Any other sane woman wouldn't have nerve to marry you for all your little jokes, mister"

"What are you doing, anyway?"

You turn back to the oven and check on the cookies. "Baking cookies to bring! Everybody loves cookies~! Now go get dressed. Why do you always choose to sleep so late? Oliver and the other's will be over soon and only I can see you walk around the house in just your boxers" He hugged you from behind before kissing down your neck. You giggled a bit. "Al, stop. I don't have time for this. T-the cookies might burn for real!"

"So? Plus you owe me" There was sudden knocking at the door. "Shit. Why can't I ever win?"

"Go upstairs!", you yelled quietly. "Go! Go! Now!"

The knocking continued. "Aye! You two put on some damn clothes! We're here!", you heard Matt through the door.

You pushed Al to the stairs before fixing yourself up a bit and answering the door. "Aye....Shut up. I been dressed thank you...Hey Ollie!"

"Hello dear!"

As they came into the house, you noticed Oliver was carrying a present with him. "What's that?"

"Oh! I got it for Kat!"

"Aww~! That's so sweet!"

"I do hope she likes it"

"You should've just gave her money", Al remarked as he was coming from up the stairs, putting on a shirt on his way down. "She's broke as fuck"

"A-Al!...It's just difficult for her to keep a job..."

"I feel like one of us should've made a joke about her breast, right now", Francis hinted at.

"...True", you agreed. "That's a sad thing"

Oliver sat the gift on the couch and his container of cupcakes on the table before he peeked over to the kitchen. "Did you bake something, dear?"

"...My cookies!!!", you ran off to the kitchen. "Don't burn! Don't burn! Don't burn!...D-damn it"

"Christmas cupcakes are better anyway darling~! Don't fret!"

When it was time to leave, everyone rode with you and Al. You made Al drive though. Since you brought a few gifts, you kept them all in a big bag. It was red and decorated with snowflakes. "Here it is!", you pointed out as he pulled up in front of the house.

"Damn", Al, Matt, and Francis chorused.

"Yeah...My uncle Ivan has a REALLY big house. That's why Christmas is at his house! Got a big family!", you explained before exiting the car, being followed by everyone else. You rung the door bell then waited. One of your younger cousins answered the door.

"O-oh! H-hey (name)"

"Hey Ravis! Haven't seen you in awhile. What you been up too?"

"N-not much. I-Ivan put me over here to open the door for people"

"Uncle still bullying you?"

"Y-yes"

You ruffle his hair. "It'll get better Ravis. Don't worry"

"T-thanks (name)"

"Oh! I got you something too!"

"R-really?" You dug through the bag before handing him a tape measure that had green ribbon tied around it. He lowered his head as he accepted it. "W-wow. Thanks (name)"

You nodded to him before you all fully entered the house. "I knew he'd totally love that awesome present" In the distance, you saw your aunt Katyusha. You looked over to Oliver to tell him but you saw he already caught sight of her. His eyes were sparkling as he watched her. When she saw him, you saw the same look in her eyes. "Well damn", you mumbled before her and her daughter, Dyah came over.

"H-hello Oliver", she greeted him shyly.

"Oh dear. I do like it better for you to call me Ollie"

Her cheeks tinted with blush. "O-ok...O-Ollie"

"It sounds so much cuter when you say it!"

She giggled. "Well I'm totally not here anymore", Dyah shrugged a bit.

"O-oh! This is my daughter! Dyah"

"Nice to meet you, darling!" He held his hand out for her.

"You too sir", she politely shook his hand and smiled.

"She's my only child. She's very polite and sweet though. Do you want to go talk over there? Can I help you carry one of the things your holding?" Oliver nods before following her and giving her the gift.

"I actually got this for you and these are cupcakes I made. I would love for you to try them"

"O-ok~!" They walked off.

"Is that gonna be my new step-dad?"

"...Maybe", you hinted.

"That'll make you my sister-in-law then", Al mentioned.

"I'm fine with that. You're cool by me" She hit his hand before bringing him in for a short hug. 

"Anyway! Dyah, you remember Matt?"

"Oh yeah! I remember him from the wedding! He's the one I remember smelled like pot the whole time" She moved one of her hands over her mouth kind of casually. "Uhm...Not like I know...what marijuana smells like uhm...You just smelt weird and...it was a strong sent so like...I just assumed that was what it was..."

Matt leaned over and sniffed twice. "You know, you smell like weed"

"Do you smoke?"

"Yes. Do you?"

"Yes. Do you wanna go get high with me?"

"Fuck yeah"

"Well guess what kind of awesome cousin I am and got you for Christmas?!" You shuffled over other presents in your big bag before pulling out a tin container. "I even baked it for you!"

"You...are the best cousin ever!! W-where'd you get it? What kind is it?"

"Don't worry about where I got it just know it had no sticks, no stems, and you could smell it from up the stairs in my house right after opening the bag"

And just like that, Matt and Dyah left you and Al after she took her present happily. "...Well that was fast. Hey Francis?" You looked around yourself and didn't find your brother-in-law. You sighed and assumed he was with at least one of your female cousins. "Come on Al. Lets see if we can find my mom"

"I like your mom. She's cool"

"Of course she is. She's my mom" You looked around until you found your mom talking with your uncle Ivan. "Hey ma"

"(name)!" She hugged you tightly. "Oh! Do you know how long it's been since you came to visit me?! Oh I missed you! You don't call me enough! I know you're married now but I'm your mom! I birthed you! That's reason enough for you to come and visit me more"

"Ma!" Al was laughing so hard he had to try and support himself with the wall. "E-encase you forgot, I got a totally cool husband who's probably gonna make fun of me the whole car ride back home!"

She lets you go. "Sorry honey" She grabbed Al by his ear. "And you! I know you didn't have the nerve to not say hi to me!"

"O-ow! I'm sorry. Hey Ms.(l-"

"Don't you dare call me Ms. (last name)!" She pulls him into a hug. "I'm your mom too!"

"H-hey ma"

"There we go! You get use to that! I know you're all cool and stuff but you're not too cool to say hi to your mother-in-law!" She cuddled him a bit. "And you tell Ollie that I still want those baby pictures of you! I bet you were such a cute little baby too!"

"I-I need to take a picture!", you got out in between laughs.

She unhands him then smiles to you. "Even?"

You give her a thumbs up. "Yeah!" Al was blushing from all the love he just received. You poke his cheek. "We even"

"Has he been picking on you (name)?", your mom sarcastically questioned you.

"Yes he has!"

"She's been bullying me, mom!", Al pointed to you and told on you.

"Nu-uh!"

"Well the next time she bullies you, call me and when you come over, I'll show you some home videos of when she was little. Give you some good material on her"

"Mom!"

"I love our mom!", Al hugged her arm.

"La! La! La! I don't care!" You turned to your uncle to try and ignore them. "Ma was adopted, wasn't she uncle Ivan?"

"I hope not. She's my favorite sister and it's nice to think one of us could be a little normal"

"Have I ever told you, I'm glad (name) could find a boy as fun as you and I was hoping you'd come with her" Your mother slyly handed Al a gift. When he had it in his hand, he realized it was a disk inside it. "Don't tell (name) and watch it by yourself first. After that, you can blackmail her with her 'Christmas dance' from when she was six"

"You are the best"

"What are you two talking about?!", you quickly see that they weren't talking loudly for awhile.

"Nothing sweetie. Just telling your husband how happy I am that he's a part of the family now", you could tell her smile was fake as she patted Al on the back.

You grab his arm. "We're going to go say hi to other people"

"Have fun!", she waved to you both as you walked away. "Merry Christmas, Santa's little helper!"

"Ma!!" She waves some more after you look back to her."You're not watching any of my home videos. I promise that"

"Sure", he looked at you with an evil smile.

"I'm ser-"

"Hey (name)!", your white haired cousin, Gilbert came up to you.

"Hey Gil"

"How are ya? Looking pretty. Nice kind of awesome husband you got. Did you change your hairstyle? It looks nice"

"What do you want?", you blankly try to get to his point.

"Have you seen Dyah?"

"Yeah. She's with her boyfriend"

"Nu-uh. I'm right here"

You roll your eyes. "She has a real boyfriend now"

"No way! She's mine! We were married at one point, you know"

"We were five and playing house and didn't understand what incest was"

"Five, twenty-five. What's the difference? She's still my girlfriend"

"No. She's still your cousin"

"Distant cousin! We're not that close!"

"You sick. You real sick, Gil. We all grew up together"

"Whatever. Plus Dyah can't keep a man anyway"

You grind against the air. "Well she's learning how to keep one now"

Gilbert looked at you as if you just defiled a child. "You dirty (name)! That's your cousin!"

"Oh! I got you a gift!" You fiddled through your bag again before finding a bottle of lotion with a small ribbon tied around it's neck. You held it out to him.

"You're a bad person...You a real bad person"

You flipped him off. He huffed before he left. You dropped the present back in your bag. "Your whole family. Incest"

"Two people! Two! And Gil doesn't like Dyah, he likes her boobs so that doesn't count!", you debated before something soft rubbed against your leg. 

You looked down and you both noticed a cat. "Fuck. He's close"

"Quiet Al!"

The cat was soon picked up by your brown haired, Greek cousin. "Oh, you're a little trouble maker, aren't you? Why are you always running off?"

"Hey Hercles", you greeted him.

"Oh. Hey (name). Hey Al. Sorry. This one just keeps walking around all by himself"

"Maybe he's trying to get away from your crazy ass", Al muttered.

You elbowed him then showed a smile to your cousin. "He's probably just curious. You know cats"

"Yes. I do"

You blinked a few times as a silence slowly started to develop. "...Well ok then. Uhm. I got you a little present"

"Really?"

"Uh-huh. Let me just see if...I can find it in my bag real quick...Ah ha! Here we go!" You pulled out a large plastic ring that had about thirty different collars on it like keys on a keychain.

Al put his arm over your shoulder. "We both thought this would be great for you"

"Yup!"

He looked at it for a little while. "...Collars?"

"For your...many pets, cous"

His hand reached out then took them. "Oh. How thoughtful"

"Have you seen your cousin Dyah lately?", Al mentioned to him.

"Uhm...", he thought for awhile.

"...You kinda acting like you had some of her present"

"...I don't think I get it"

"I-it's nothing! Don't worry about that!" You turned him back in the direction he came. "Go a long. I think I saw one of your cats over there!"

"Oh..." He started on his way.

"Don't bring up Dyah's stuff in front of family...Don't anybody know but us"

"All your rules"

"Aww! I missed kitty!...But I found (name)!" You were hugged from behind. "Hello bella~! I haven't seen you in forever!"

"Feli!!", you joyously remembered his voice as you enjoyed the hug til he let you go. You turned to face him then gave him your own hug. "I know!" You punch his arm.

"O-ow!"

"That's for not showing to my wedding!"

"I'm sorry bella. I wasn't in town that day. I'm sad I have to live so far away from you"

Feliciano suddenly got his strange curl tugged at by your other cousin, Ludwig, causing him to stand still while his face slowly went red. The blonde and Feli were good friends, as well as cousins. Ludwig was also Gilbert's younger brother. "What have I told you about running off like that?!"

"Y-yes but Lu-", Feli's light words were cut off by you.

"Yo! Lud! I-I don't really think y-you should be pulling on that"

"It's fine. I figured out that if you pull on this curl, he stays quiet and still. I don't know why. It's like magic though"

Al leaned over and whispered to you, "So is how fast your cousin just got hard"

"Huh?" You were confused by his comment then looked around before your eyes just so happened to catch glimpse of Feli's pants. "O-oh! D-didn't need that! U-uhm!"

"You pervert!", you heard a different Italian accent besides Feli's. You looked over Ludwig's shoulder and saw Lovino, Feli's brother. He looked mad, like always.

Ludwig turned to him after letting go of Feli's hair. Feliciano ran off quickly. "Oh. Hello Lovino", he casually greeted him.

"I let you touch his curl one time when we got our hair caught and now you just want to abuse it!"

"...What are you talking about?"

You and Al looked to each other and mumbled. "That curl gets his dick hard"

"Anyway!", you cleared your throat. "Hey Lovino!"

"Oh. Ragazza"

"I have a name. It's not ragazza. We've known each other for the longest and you always do this"

"Then you should probably stop trying to correct me, damn it. You can see I'm going to say it every time"

"This is my totally awesome, cool ass, epic husband. He's like so cool", you introduced Al then moved him in front of you.

"...Eh", Lovi shrugged.

"You just mad cause my potty mouth got me married and yours keeps girls as one night stands"

"Screw you! This is why I don't like when I have to see you again!"

"I got you something though~! Check this awesome present I got you!" You pulled out two things. One was a book and the title read, 'Manners for dummies' and the next was a bar of soap. "See? Keep ya mouth all clean for me and big cousin got you a nice book to read too!" He glared at you before walking off. "You forgot your present though!...Come on! You know you love it!...Anyway. I got you something too Ludwig"

Dyah turned to him. "Hey Mathias?"

"Yes my cousin Dyah?"

"Quiet you two!!", you fussed but Al held you back, seeming interested. You knew what they were getting to.

"Do you remember and I quote 'Alfred said when he's like superman that I can be like his Mary-Jane! He's gonna practice flying and he said I practice being pretty...but then he said I practiced enough and let me fly on his back! He's gonna protect me from everything!" She swayed side to side. "Alfred is so cool~!"

"S-shut up!! I-I was four!!"

"Oh memories!", Mathias reminisced with her. "I was out getting REAL girls while my friends were chasing cousins...weirdo's....which also makes me the most awesome!"

"Congratulations!" Him and Dyah hug.

"Ha!", Alfred laughed. "That was like so long ago! (name) was just the first girl I actually talked to. I don't like her at all now though...Oh sorry (name)"

You twitched a bit. "It's fine, Alfred"

"No. no. I know it must hurt to not be able to be with a hero like me"

"I think I'll live"

"Are you sure?"

You sighed then held your hand up in front of you along with Al's. "I'm married, if you missed that"

"Oh yeah...He's...cool"

"What?"

"Nothing against you dude, it's just...you're....alright"

"I really don't like your family, (name)", Al bluntly told you.

"I know...I'm sorry"

"Whoa! I'm excluded from that, right?!", Dyah yelled.

"Yeah! You're cool"

"Good...I didn't want to have to find Elizabeta and have to squad up on you...Cause I can not find her. I have not seen her since you guys got here..." Dyah looks all around her.

"Me either!", Gil responded. "Which is weird...but she hasn't hit me all day so I'm good!"

"I wonder where she is? She's usually my protection from family I don't like. I had to talk to Gil like five times cause she wasn't there to smack him with a skillet that I have no idea where she keeps" Gilbert rubs his face as if he just got hit by her.

"...I really hope she's not with who I'm thinking. I really wanna hope she's not", you shook your head, hoping.

"Who?"

"....M-my brother-in-law"

"You mean Oliver? He's with my mom"

"N-no...F-Francis"

"Oh god! She wouldn't!", Dyah freaked. "I heard he got both Laura and Michelle...at the same damn time! On your wedding day too!"

"I-I know. I heard. I really wish I didn't know which cousins"

You saw your mom stand on top of the dining table, being cautious of the food of course, then clapped four times. "You hear me yell 'Chrismas here!'" Everyone in the house chorused waht your mom said. "Cool! Now! I love all you guys. I really do but lets make this visit a non-incest one. Not saying any names. Cough. Cough. Both my sisters Natalia and Katyusha"

Your aunt Natalia hissed at her. "You stay away from big brother! He's mine! Don't touch!"

"Wasn't planning on it, sis. Gross. I really wish you'd go to the therapist like I begged you when I was twelve and caught you trying to kiss Ivan in his sleep"

"O-oh god! Did she do that to me often?!"

"Yes, but this is all besides the point! Yes my younger sister may be bipolar and yeah my oldest sister has boobs the size of Russia and there is nothing we can do to help either one of them, but what we can do...is laugh at it all as a family! This is Christmas you guys! The time for joy, smiles, and jokes about each other's past. Like (name), my rude daughter who doesn't call me enough, when she was little and thought that toothpaste was peppermint and ate almost a half a tube of it on Christmas when she was six"

"Mom!!"

"Stomach ache the next day saying 'Mama!! I don't wanna brush my teeth anymore!'"

"Oh! I get it! Or like when we were younger, and you tried to grind up a rock because you thought all rocks made salt", Ivan chuckled along with a lot of your cousins. "Remember sis?"

"Hey!...You forgot the part where I mixed it with snow cause I thought that was how it turned white"

"I remember! You used a hammer to break the rocks which I thought was very dangerous!", your aunt Kitty added.

"You helped too so don't be judging, Kitty!", your mom reminded her.

Dyah pats you on the back. "Look at that. Our parents had weirder childhoods than us" You smiled and nodded with her.

"What was that Dyah?!", your mom leaned forward a bit. "You can't talk about anything! You lucky I let you talk during these family visits"

"What I do though?!"

"Your whole childhood defines weird, miss. scared of grass!"

"I was two!! Grass is creepy!! Stop bringing that up auntie!"

"S-sis! Don't tease my daughter...or I'll have to tease (name)", Katyusha threatened slyly.

"Oh~! Such threats! Go at it!"

"How about (name's) Christmas dance?"

Mostly everyone in the whole began laughing and your face heated up. That was one of your most embarrassing memories that pretty much every one in your family saw. "T-that was to never be brought up again!!"

"Cheers!!", your mm raised a glass in the air. "To family! Welcome to it Al! All this crazy is now half your problem to deal with every Christmas, Thanksgiving, and possibly this New year's too!!"

"Cheers!", shouted everyone.

"Now lets get drunk!"

Two days after Christmas, you felt like resting but new year's was gonna be here soon and you wanted to spend it with a few of your cousins. A few. While you were talking to Dyah on the house phone, explaining your plans for the next holiday, you saw Al walking towards you, grinning weirdly. "...Hold on, Dyah. Al what is with you?"

"Oh nothing...Just watched a little video"

"I told you, I'm not a porn star and I'm not doing any of those"

"But you were a little dance star though"

You froze up. "...You know nothing"

"I don't?"

"Nothing!"

He snickered then you heard Dyah say, "Did your mom let him watch that?!"

"She wouldn't!"

"You, Dyah, Elizabeta, and your friend Nancy were gonna start a dance group when you were eight"

"M-my mom is so cruel"

"You were just determined to be the leader weren't you?"

"S-shut up!!"

"Til you tripped up during a dance you guys were doing for Christmas"

"Ha!! Nancy tried to tell you!!", Dyah was adding unhelpful comments in your ear. "We told you to roll up your pants leg but you said you looked famous with long pants. Karma, cous!! Karma!!"

Al purposely fell to the floor. ""I-I meant to do that, mama! I-I meant it!'", he quoted you from the video.

You hit your face as Dyah laughed through the phone. "I-I'm so getting mom back for this one"

"Good luck!", the two chorused.